Long and crappy weekend

It was cold. It snowed on Saturday. Ian was gone. He had dinner with us on Friday and then worked in his office (downtown) from 8 am - 11pm both on Saturday AND Sunday. I had to take the kids with me to a baby shower. Saturday was really tough. The kids were so terribly disappointed when dad left that they were miserable all day. Today was a little better -- as soon as Ian left I put them to work. Ben sorted and ran laundry; Nikki helped me with the dishes and vacuumed the floor.

Yesterday we ate popcorn and read Comet in Moominland for an hour. This morning we watched the live version of 101 Dalmations in our jammies. Then we cataloged the differenced between the book, the cartoon, and the movie. Tonight I think we will have a reprisal of reading and popcorn.

Ben was excited as he started to see the materials for next week come off the photocopier/printer and start to pile up on my desk. He kept asking, "What's this?" "Can we do this now?" He also had his first moment of trepidation last night. After I put everyone to bed and sat down to work Ben came up to me. "Can I still see Ms. M?" Yes, of COURSE. We'll go visit her. "Can I still see my friends?" Yes, of course! We can still do playdates. I walked him back to his bed and lay down next to him. I asked him if he wanted to change his mind. He said, "No. It is just always scary when you start something new but then as soon as you start it can be something wonderful." When did my little boy get so wise?

We sat and talked for a long time. He talked about all of the things that had been scaring him at school. He talked about how hard it was to not be able to read the instructions, how lonely he felt during free reading time, how he hated always having to ask for help, how sometimes everyone was too busy to help him and he had to do his best and he didn't know what to do, how sad it made him when he didn't know how to spell the words on the spelling tests, how he couldn't understand things other kids could, etc. He just takes everything in life so personally. I think seeing the light at the end of the tunnel made him feel that he could talk about everything that had been making him miserable; before, when he saw that there was no hope, he felt it wasn't even worth talking about. We talked for a long time and then he drifted off to sleep...